My first night in Edinburgh, I slept in the airport. I waited too long to book a bed in a hostel, so I found myself a bench without arm rests and laid down. I woke up an hour later, relieved to be in good company. There were people laying all over the airport, on benches, on the floor, on top of each other. I laid my head back down. It wasn’t my best nights sleep, but it wasn’t the worst I’ve ever had, either.
No longer do I stress about plans, itineraries, or logistics. Still, the biggest scar I wear is my anxiety. How can I live authentically in a society that has rejected me? I don't want to hide what I've been through, but I also don't want to jeopardize my peace of mind. Traveling with the film has forced me to face my fears head on. I don’t think I would feel anxious about sharing my story if the world didn’t seem so judgmental... but I've learned that some people will judge you no matter what you do, so let the jerks be cranky and move on. The kid in me wants to be loved and accepted by everyone. The growing man I am understands that my energy is needed elsewhere.
Maybe one day I can retire from being transgender and just be myself, but for now, I feel an obligation to take this opportunity to say that it doesn't matter who you are, what your body looks like, which god you pray to, or what underwear (if any) you choose, if you are a decent human being, why does it matter?
In the same way that you are you, I am me.
Transitioning isn’t just a physical journey. It is emotional. It is spiritual.
We are up against a lot. This is not for the faint of heart.
We are strong people.
our journeys transform those that love us
So, as this film travels the world, revealing my process to audiences far and wide, I want you to know that I did this for you;
for the ones just starting.
for the next generation.
for their families.
for those that feel alone.
for the ones who didn't make it,
for the ones that need some validation,
because they just want to be loved,
accepted, & celebrated as they are.
<3